My Tribe

Even though I consider myself to be a social person, I've always been a bit of a homebody too. Home is where I'm most comfortable, and I love nothing more than putting on a comfy pair of yoga pants and curling up with a blanket on the couch with my husband. Home is where I can create the exact environment that I want, and I find so much joy in making this place a beautiful, cozy space for our little family to grow and thrive.

But the longer I'm a mama, the more I find myself needing out of the house, needing to be around other women in this same stage of life. The first year of Grayson's life I didn't have that type of community at all. I was the first of my friends here in Texas to have a baby, and the neighborhood we lived in was mostly families with older children or retired couples. A was working from home, so I saw him sporadically throughout the day, and I didn't feel too lonely.

But the older Grayson got, the more I needed something more. We moved to a new neighborhood filled with young families, and I joined the neighborhood moms group. I made some fun friends, and G and I were out and about a few times a week doing fun things. It was just what I needed. Not long after that, I joined a MOPS group at a local church at the suggestion of one of my new mom friends. It was another very welcome way to get out and socialize with mamas while having some "me" time.

I'm still in the moms group, and there are several mamas that I truly love spending time with, although it can certainly be challenging to bond much with crazy kids swirling around you the entire time. And I'm also in MOPS again this year, and it really has been a blessing to me. But somehow I still find myself longing for more.

I'm not sure what it is that I'm searching for exactly, but I think it's that whole "tribe" thing you hear people speak of. It's almost like I want to find what I had when I was younger, in high school or college - girls who can come together, cozy up on the couch, and chat about everything that's going on in life. Of course, you get older, you get married and have children, and that time is replaced with family time. I love my family time. My weekends are devoted to family time, and I never want anything to interfere with that. But I still need to be able to find some time to come together with other women in the same stage of life, to just talk about what we're going through and laugh, cry, and find joy in the madness of motherhood together.

I don't know what this means, exactly. I feel like my life is evolving, about to venture down some new path that I don't even know exists. I hope that I can take all of the feelings and desires and stirrings in my heart that I'm experiencing and turn them into something. What that might be, I'm not totally sure. But I'm hopeful that it will be something good.

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