I Don't Know Why I'm Crying...

Pregnancy really does make you question your sanity from time to time. I feel like overall I've been pretty chill throughout this whole ordeal, and after the first trimester my emotions seemed to level out back to somewhat normal. However, the past few days have proved that I might not be quite as balanced as I think.

On Sunday when Arsen was putting the baby's new dresser together, I was in the room "assisting". Basically sitting on the floor scrolling through Instagram photos and occasionally tightening a screw for him. After he was about halfway through the process, it was time to put the top of the dresser on. We stood up, and I "helped" him lift it onto the base. The minute it was sitting where it was supposed to be, I saw it: a massive scratch. Not just a scratch, but a chip in the wood.

When I say massive, I mean maybe half an inch wide. But in my eyes, the entire dresser was ruined. It was front and center and I knew it would be the first part of the dresser to be seen. Of course I immediately start panicking just a little, because ohmygodwhatdowedo??? I knew there was no way Arsen was going to undo all of the work he had already done to take it apart and return it to IKEA, and I knew there was no way I could live with that scratch.

He kept trying to convince me that it was fine. No, it was NOT fine. He said we could paint over it, it would be fine. NO, that won't work, it will never look right. Everyone will be able to tell. He said, quite calmly, we are not taking this apart just to return it and do it all over again. We will figure something out. It's not a big deal.

At this point I lost it. Seriously, lost it. My eyes starting welling up and I felt those crazy pregnancy hormones surge through me. I started crying.

Arsen looked at me with a mixture of disbelief and amusement. He said something along the lines of, "Wait, are you crying? Are you really crying?". My response, through my sobbing, was "YES! It's ruined, and I can't deal with this! I cannot live with a messed up dresser! Every time I see it it's going to piss me off and make me cry and I won't be able to deal with it! I want this room to be perfect and this dresser is ruining EVERYTHING!!!"

At this point Arsen lost it, too. He started laughing so hard that he couldn't stop. Which made me cry harder, but it also made me laugh, because I knew just how insane I sounded. So I'm bawling my eyes out while I'm laughing saying "Shut up, it's not funny! I'm serious!". After a few seconds of trying to gather myself, I walked out of the room, wiped my eyes and took a few deep breathes. Then I came back in and calmly explained that we had to figure something else out so I wouldn't lose my mind every time I saw the scratch. He definitely agreed.

I decided to call IKEA to see what they could do, and they said all we needed to do was bring the top part in and they would switch it out for a new one. Huh. Who knew it could be so simple?

A little bit later Arsen started laughing again and said "Why were you laughing with me? Did you know you were being insane and you just couldn't control it?". The answer is yes. And that pretty much sums up the emotional roller coaster of pregnancy. You know what you're watching, reading, thinking, etc. shouldn't really make you burst into tears, you know this logically, but yet...you're helpless to control it. It's really something to experience.

8 comments

  1. Can I confess something to you? I didn't think I was emotional through my pregnancy at all... and it wasn't until I looked back post-pregnancy to realize that THROWING THINGS AT YOUR SPOUSE is not normal. HAHA. Oops. Pregnancy makes you do some crazy things and it's not until everything levels back out that you realize how insane the whole process is. Beautiful? Of course. But it's also messy, kinda scary, and a whole lot of feeling a bit alien. I still remember the first time I felt like myself again after my daughter was born. It was amazing. Also, perhaps the first glass of wine helped too. :)

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  2. aww I can't relate but I cry when I'm stressed and it's usually something small that sets me off. My husband thinks I'm weird haha...Thank goodness Ikea was helpful

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  3. Oh and it will get worse. There were times I would cry over nothing and sometimes yell at my husband for something he said 2 weeks earlier. Oh and wait until 6 weeks after you have the baby. Hormone overload! Oh and my Ikea dresser for Jack's room ended up having to have nails put in the top. It looks a mess but I learned to live with it.

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  4. OMG I'm so glad you posted this. I don't even recognize myself half the time...I started crying because I couldn't decide on a dresser or bedding the other day. I had been aimlessly searching online for hours and was just getting so upset that I wasn't finding the "perfect" anything and all of a sudden the tears started rolling. WTF?! Pregnancy has it's drawbacks in times like these. And I told you when I get super excited/laughing as hard as I can, I start an ugly crying session right? Definitely happened in Target...now I have to steer clear of the Awkward Familly Photo card section... I think it's just the heightened emotion that just sets me off but it is the craziest thing I've ever experienced.

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  5. Lol I'm not pregnant and I'll get crazy like this. Haha it's so irrational but when you can't control your feelings, you can't control your feelings. At least you have an excuse!

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  6. I love this. Reminds me of the time when I lost it because the frozen yogurt place I was craving was closed. I seriously couldn't stop crying for like an hour. Andy offered to go get some different froyo for me or go buy something at the store, but I was craving that SPECIFIC froyo. So sad. And funny. :-)

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  7. I love this so much. I cried on the phone to Jason because my cottage cheese at work was expired and he told me not to eat it. I cried AND hung up on him...then called him back 5 minutes later to apologize and then started crying because I had been so mean to him.

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  8. Hi, Great post. I found you through the blog hop. Please stop by and say hi when you get a chance. .Be sure and check out my new Blog Hop that started. It's Weekly Goals Link Up. It's a great way to stay on track. Have a great day. :)



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