I've spent a lot of this morning watching the news as I work from home, and as everyone knows, there is rarely any positive news to be seen. But the absolute shock and horror at what I have been watching this morning is something that I am having a hard time dealing with.
It's still very early on in the reporting, but what I've heard so far is that one, possibly two, gunmen went into an elementary school in Connecticut and began shooting. At least 27 people were killed, most of them children.
I don't even know what to say or think. My mind can't comprehend that this kind of evil exists. Why someone would go into a school full of innocent children and open fire....how can something like this happen? And to think that two people may have come together and developed a plan to carry something like this out? I honestly just can't comprehend it.
Thinking of what the children who survived must have seen...and to think about those who didn't make it. My heart absolutely breaks. The parents who are dealing with this, being so fearful that your child didn't make it, and if they did, knowing how to deal with the questions they would have? I can't imagine.
I try to not focus on negative things here on my little blog, because I want it to be a happy place and to capture all of the wonderful things I want to remember. But today, I just needed a place to get this out.
I am not one to say "I'll pray for you", or to encourage prayer...not that I don't believe in it, I just feel that it's become something that people say, and often times it doesn't seem the most sincere. But today, I will be praying for the people in Connecticut, and for all of humanity, really. I'm not someone who typically gets on board with the whole "What is this world coming to? It's the end of the world!" thing. But my God...what a truly terrifying world we live in. Just thinking of this baby boy that's growing inside of me, and the fact that someday I'll have to let him out into this world as an independent person....it makes me feel sick with worry already.
I know there are so many wonderful people, wonderful things, kindness and happiness in the world. But today, it's hard to see that. At what is supposed to be the most wonderful time of the year, we have certainly been seeing a lot of tragedy in recent days. I plan on giving my husband a big hug when he walks through the door tonight, cuddling up with my tiny little family, and counting my blessings. And remembering all of the people who aren't so fortunate.