Worries of a Dog Mama

On Friday morning, Arsen got up earlier than normal, showered, and came back to bed to cuddle with me for a few minutes before I had to get up and get ready for work. We were laying in bed chatting about the baby, he had his hand on my belly and was feeling him kick, and it was all very sweet. I reached down to the foot of the bed and pulled Addie up to join in on the cuddling, and it was this perfect little cheesy moment of happiness for me. I had my love and my little baby dog and my boy kicking around in my belly. And then I started getting a little sad.

Addie will always be my first "baby". I've gone on and on about how nervous I am about how much her little life is going to change when baby boy arrives, and the closer we get the more I worry. As we laid there talking, I started telling Arsen a bit about how concerned I am.

Arsen is Addie's world. She loves her mama, don't get me wrong, but I'm more the one she wants at night when she's sleepy and she wants to curl up in a warm lap, or who she wants when she's feeling sick and needs to cuddle. She comes to me for food and love, and I'm perfectly happy with that arrangement. But her dad...man oh man does she love him. If she wants to play, he's her guy. And when it gets to be the time of night when he should be getting home from work she seems to sense it and she starts watching the back door.

Right now, anytime Arsen or I come home Addie runs to the door and jumps around and wags her tail and jumps up to be petted. Then she runs over to the chair in the living room and jumps up on the back of it so she can be on our level and get in some more affection. We both dote on her for a few minutes after we get home no matter how long we've been gone. I always ask her about her day, if she was a good girl, etc....I know, ridiculous. Arsen, on the other hand, almost always says something along the lines of "Hi mamiczka (mom-ich-ka)" or "Hi solniczka (sol-nich-ka)" and loves on her for awhile. (By the way, what he's saying is hi mama or hi sunshine in Russian. And that spelling was my terrible attempt at guessing how it might possibly be spelled, but I'm sure I was horribly off base.) She gets 100% of our attention for several minutes, and she just eats it up.

The thing I'm concerned about is how much this will change here in a year or so. When the baby is big enough, I know he will run to the door the minute he hears his papa coming in. And I know that Arsen is going to immediately pick that little guy up and love on him like crazy. And in my mind, I see poor Addie jumping up, begging for attention, and getting ignored. And it breaks my freaking heart!

When I was telling Arsen about it, I started crying. Seriously. Just a few tears and a shaky voice, but enough for him to feel the need to assure me that he will never forget about Addie and will always give her the attention she deserves. And I hope that he's right, and that she is always loved as much as she is today.  People keep telling me once the baby is here it just won't matter as much to me, that I'll love the baby so much that it will seem silly how much I care about Addie. And every time someone tells me that it makes me furious. Just because that's how it happened for you doesn't mean it will for me....and if it does, that's not something to be happy about! I think it's awful! These little pups love their owners more than anything in the world, and to suddenly be replaced is such a sad thing.

She's my baby, my "first-born", the one who taught me what it is to be completely responsible for another life. She taught Arsen and I both so much about responsibility, about balancing our time, about being patient. She came to us more than three years ago as a scrawny little 9 pound abandoned pup who honestly looked more like a rat than a dog, and has turned in to a spoiled little 13 pound diva who has more love than most doggies will ever know.

I know when our little man arrives I will love him with a fierceness I can't even imagine at this moment, even though the love I feel for him already is insane. But I never, ever want to forget how much I adore this little fur-baby of mine. She's my girl and she means the world to me, and I want her to feel adored and loved and content and happy until the day she's no longer with us. 

very first pic!
so teeny tiny

 early days with dad

healthy and happy one year later
 Cowboys fans for life

 our diva

family of three :) 

 mama's girl

melts my heart


  1. I understand exactly how you feel. My Lexi was my world before Jack came along. I couldn't imagine ignoring her. I still love my Lexi and do my best to give her the attention she deserves but it just isn't what she use to have and that breaks my heart. What I love is how she will lay beside Jack on the floor during tummy time and how she will run and find me when Jack starts crying.

  2. Girl, I am here to offer some words of encouragement. I had the same fears before we welcomed Leila into the world nearly 4 years ago. My Billy dog was my first baby, and my love and life before I had "real" babies. And he still is! Andy & I talked a lot about how we wanted to make sure he wasn't neglected when Leila came and when she was born, we stuck to our plans. We continued to give him lots of love and attention and we took turns taking him on walks by himself (without a stroller & baby). Now, I have two little ones and as soon as we get home, Billy runs to us and jumps up to be petted and loved on. I get the kiddos settled and immediately give him the love and attention he craves. Yes, he doesn't get as much one on one attention as he used to. BUT, he is still VERY much loved. And now there are two little souls in our family who love him just as much. Everything will be fine. Addie will always be your first baby and you will figure out a way to make time for her.

    In terms of coming home from the hospital with baby, this is what we did to make sure that Billy adjusted ok... When we had the baby, Billy stayed with my parents while we were in the hospital. I made sure that they were all at our house waiting for us when we brought Leila home. When we got home I went inside and got Billy and brought him out to the car to smell the new baby. He was so excited to see us and totally into Leila! Then, he followed us into the house with the baby. This way he wasn't just coming home to some strange baby and new smells at HIS house - she was coming into HIS home. Once we got settled, Andy took him for a long walk alone. From day one, we just made a conscious effort to give him extra love.

  3. Awwww I wish Addie could read this! It really is so sweet and I love the fact you're concerned so much for her. She truly is the luckiest dog. The good thing is that I've been plenty of babies really take to the family dog and all that means is that Addie will get even more love from another member of the family!

  4. Oh girl, I was the same way with our pup Bailey! I would look at her and cry because I felt so guilty. Bailey has done amazing with the transition, the amount of attention she gets has definitely changed but it's been a good transition because while I am feeding Kenley, Jason will play with Bailey or take her outside etc. So she gets quality time and attention. She absolutely loves the baby and is always checking on her. When Addie sees how much you guys love her baby brother, she'll catch on! This also sounds silly...but once a month I will take Bailey to get her nails trimmed. It's like our special little outing, just the two of us. LOL. So dumb, but she gets SO excited. It may take a few months but all four of you will get a system down where everyone is getting love and attention! :)


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