Girl Friends

I've always had a very interesting relationship with other females. I'm a pretty girly-girl, and you would think I'd be the type of person that would love to be surrounded by tons of other similar-minded women. But for as long as I can remember I've never been comfortable making new girl friends. It's why I didn't join a sorority in college, and it's why I've usually hung out with one or two girls and then several guys. Even now, I usually end up spending my time with Arsen and all of his friends rather than making an effort to find other girls to hang out with.

I've had the same best friend since about third grade (minus a year or two when she hated me in junior high), and I had a great group of girl friends that I hung out with throughout my years in junior high/high school. In my "adult" life, I've only become close with a handful of women. Of course I have lots of people who I consider to be friends of mine, but I'm talking about the kind of friend that you call on the phone and chat with on a semi-regular basis, the type that you ask to run errands with you or come over to lounge on the couch in sweats watching movies. I honestly can only think of a few girls that I feel that way about.

I think the reason for this is that I've always been insanely insecure. The older I get the more confident I feel, but still to this day I just assume that most people who meet me don't really want to be friends. I have no idea where that comes from, but it is what it is. Arsen has spent the last five years trying to convince me that people actually do like me and trying to encourage me to reach out to people to develop a friendship. He's one of those people who just automatically develops a friendship with just about anyone he meets, so it's hard for him to understand how I feel.

And it's not that I'm socially awkward or can't make conversation. For the most part I always feel like when I'm meeting someone new that I put off a good "vibe" and make a good impression. But then I never, ever feel comfortable reaching out to develop an actual friendship. I always feel like if someone wanted to be friends with me, they would make the effort. If they don't reach out first, I just assume they didn't really care for me.

Right now I'm at a a place in my life where I'm being forced to make new friends, simply because now that I'm a stay at home mom, I might lose my mind if I didn't find new mommy friends to relate to. There are all kinds of mommy groups around here, but I'm back in that same "no one's going to like me and I'm going to be the awkward loner" thing. I've met up with a couple of friends of friends already, and I have really enjoyed spending time with them...but now I'm at that point where things usually end. I'm going to have to force myself to be friendlier, to suck it up and just do it. I have no idea why this is hard for me, but at almost thirty years old I think it's time that I overcome whatever weirdness this is that causes me to be this way. Wish me luck, maybe?


  1. OMG..I am the same way! I am so nervous when I meet people and I always think they don't like me which everyone thinks I AM CRAZY (both for thinking that and just a crazy person in general). Now that you are a is important to go out and socialize so you don't go stir crazy...I did it frequently while on maternity leave! Good luck :)

  2. I am totally the same way! I have my handful of best buddies and beyond that I am terrible at making friends. Jason on the other hand seems to have a new buddy every other day.

  3. This is so funny to read Celeste because I never expected someone as friendly and pretty as you to ever worry about whether or not people would like you. Be your lovely self and those other moms will LOVE you, just like all of us in blog world do! XO

  4. I know what you mean... I luckily have a few girlfriends that are the kind you talk about BUT they're all in different states/cities. Which leaves me at square one for all that "hanging out on the couch/running errands together" thing. Sigh.

  5. Girl, I swear you are the blonde version of me. :) maybe this is why I've heald out on being a SAHM.

  6. You are very lucky to have a few girl friend's you can call at any time. Don't do what I did and get so caught up in being a wife and mom that you forget about everyone else. Its a very lonely place to be.


Thank you so much for taking the time to comment...each and every one makes my day just a little bit brighter!